Years ago (almost 10 yrs to be exact!!) when C was a newborn of 2 weeks and P was just 2 years old, I ventured out for my first grocery trip alone.It was a challenge to coordinate nap and nursing schedules but I admit I was feeling rather smug that we were out and about so early on...pride certainly does go before a fall! After filling my cart with the specials of the week (thankfully not a huge shopping trip) and making my way to the check out line, it became clear as we waited that P who was being quite defiant, was not going to be easily distracted or convinced to obey. A tantrum was almost in full swing and there was no reasoning with my tempermental 2 year old. So, I did what any desperate mom would do...I quickly pushed my basket to the courtesy counter and let them know of the perishables I was leaving behind. As I awkwardly carried my screaming and writhing 2 year old in one arm and the cumbersome car seat with newborn in the other, I found my heart seething as we made our way to the parking lot. Driving home I began to cry angry( and hormonal!) tears that my plans were 'interuppted' by my disobedient son... I justified my anger because, after all ,it was hard getting out the door to shop in the midst of keeping C on his nursing schedule and P on his nap schedule! I was majorly put out that I had 'wasted' a significant portion of our day in an exercise of futility! Then, I heard these words."Never an interupption, always an opportunity..they weren't audible words but this phrase kept rolling over and over in my mind. I still remember the stoplight I was sitting at when God adjusted my selfish heart. The reality was, P did not interuppt my plans...the Lord had orchestrated our day--tantrum , botched shopping trip and all...and it was no interupption but an opportunity to die to self and make the difficult choice to trust Him in the midst of situations that didn't fit 'my plan'.
Little did I realize that day how often over the years the Lord would repeatedly expose this issue in my heart through the blessing of children.
I recognized afresh yesterday, after a day of much testing and getting little(on my to do list, anyway) accomplished, that my heart is most tempted when 'my plans' are thwarted. Even'good' plans like homeschooling and housework. Again, I am reminded that God can and will use sibling conflict, willful disobedience and unmet expectations for the day as an opportunity for growth... Growth in self control for me...a practical way for me to die to self and live for Him - and a new chance to flex my trust muscles...that He orders my days and will give me every grace I need in the midst of the challenges to mother these 6 children. It is also quite often an opportunity to point a little heart to their need for a Savior. As our kiddos see their sin, I pray they will recognize their desperate need for Him, and eventually give their hearts fully to His purposes.
So, almost 12 years into parenting, I am still learning lessons impressed upon my heart in those early days. I am a slow learner and so grateful that He is a patient Father and does not deal with me as my sin deserves. (Psalm 103:10) My prayer is that his "head" knowledge would ring true in my heart as I am in the thick of the battles ~
Now onto household happenings:
Food is still quite an issue for our newest additions. The other day , as we ate a yummy meal prepared by my Mom, Mercy was just gleeful with delight over the delicious dinner. She was loudly and demonstratively(picture hand motions and facial expressions!) declaring,"This is sooo sweet....' So we called Mimi and Mercy enthusiastically yelled into the phone her compliments to the chef...then she hollered,"God will bless you- God will bless you!!"...(this reminded me of a phone call we made a few weeks ago to a caring friend who had dropped off delicious soup for us since I was sick. Evidently, it brought back memories of Mercy's beloved potato green soup and she was hysterical to listen to as she said these same words!) Of course, all the other littles wanted to get on the phone with Mimi...our 2 littlest Americans are becoming cross cultural whether they realize it or not...they also declared how 'sweeet" the meal was!
I have not had meat and rice on hand as much as I did before. Yesterday, I put a meal on the table for lunch and was met with some glum stares from our newest charges! I explained that they didn't have to eat it but this was lunch and there would be no other food offered until dinner unless they ate their lunch. After a few sullen minutes, the reality of 6 hours without food began to sink in and they ate ! I feel that we have firmly established with them that they will not go hungry again so we are now having to acclimate them to not being catered to all the time. I will continue to feed them their favorite foods on occasion but I don't want to create an 'entitlement' mentality in their hearts . I am now also limiting food quantities. If I let them, Mercy and Odesco would each consume at least 6" chickie eggs" a day. Today , our littlest man, Odesco requested more chickie eggs after having eaten 3 already ...I offered many other acceptable food choices but he was not a happy camper and after a tantrum on the kitchen floor, he has fallen asleep there. Truly, it would be so much easier to just give in to their requests but ultimately, this will be a disservice to them. So, when I say no for a good reason, I am often saying yes to some difficult moments that will inevitably follow. After the dust settles, I can usually go back and talk to the offended party about what took place and how to respond more appropriately in the future. I trust that one day, it will bear fruit :)
Mercy and Odesco do still eat their interesting selection of foods....this morning both kids requested leftover corn chowder soup which I combined with leftover stew...Mercy of course, smothered it in hot pepper flakes! Odd selection for breakfast but at least very little food is going to waste!!
Hair!!! ....well, remember my last post when I mentioned the kiddos were playing with Playdough?? Oddly enough, later in the day I was noticing sparkles in Mercy's lovely new do...somehow some of the sparkle playdough inadvertantly migrated from the table to the top of her head?! From now on, she will wear a headcovering during playdough time and fun in the sandbox!! I tried to get it out without disturbing the twists we had done on Saturday to no avail :( I decided to take her hair down to remove all the crusty playdough crumbs ...so, with all this practice, I do hope to get a bit quicker in the days ahead. So far, I am still quite clumsy and slow! She walked around with a half done head for 2 days because I just could not manage to finish it in the midst of our busy days. G also has had her share of hair woes of late. Her hair has gotten so long and the tangles quite huge -especially"snarls" at the base of her head. It took 2 sessions over 2 days of intense hair combing- even detangler was not effective. After finally getting a comb through her entire head, G agreed that she is not able to care for her hair at this length so, off we went last night to the Haircuttery for a much needed cut. By the time we arrived, she wanted it cut to just below her ears! Don't worry, we did not go that short!! But it does look cute and hair time this morning was oh, so easy- no tears and quick!!! What a relief as I have never been much of a "hair" person but I guess I will be one of these days by default :)!
For you observant folk, you will notice I dropped the B1-B4 titles for our homegrown kiddos..resorted to easier method since I often confuse myself!
Thanks for checking in!
Love,
MamaB
Sound asleep on the floor after the "chickie egg" incident...Below: Mercy and Odesco love carrying things "Liberian style" on the top of their heads...we have nixed the carrying of full plates of food this way for obvious reasons!!
Bottom: Another 'snow day'...a light dusting but thrilling to all the B children-especially our newest additions!! G taught Mercy how to make snow angels but, there was not enough snow for the full effect...that did not deter Mercy who was seen lying her back on the ground,fanning her arms and legs for much of her time outside.
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